I held his paw and slept by his side for 14 days in hospital. But it turned out, all the love in the world wasn’t enough to save him. Thus begins the final post on Life of Dozer.
My dearest Dozer,
You came into my life in my arms, holding you protectively. And after almost 14 years together, I held you in my arms protectively again as I said goodbye.
I was sobbing so hard, I forgot everything I wanted to say to you in our final moments together.
So I started writing this letter to you, to say all those things.
I wanted to reminisce about our wonderful times – the thousands of visits to the dog beach, all the wonderful food we sampled together, the cuddles, the neck-scratching-sessions, our road trips.
I wanted to thank you for spreading the joy that is you with readers all around the world, for happily coming along with me to meet readers at events, book signings, fund raisers, lunches, dinners, not to mention TV shows, photo shoots, and my gosh, we can’t forget our stint on Play School!
But as I sit here, typing away with tears streaming down my face, I realise that’s not what I want to say to you.
What I want to say is thank you.
Thank you for giving me your whole heart.
Thank you for giving me your unconditional loyalty.
Thank you for loving me just as I am, for all my flaws, for never caring what I weigh, what I wear, what I look like.
Thank you for always being there, my one constant through the good and bad times.
Thank you for making me smile, even on the hardest of days.
And thank you for trying so hard to stay with me as long as you could, fighting to heal until your very last day. I will never forget how deep you had to dig to find the strength for your rehab walk on our final morning together.
I know that one day, I will be able to look at photos of you again without sobbing. And I know all this pain I am feeling is because I loved you so fiercely and completely, and I wouldn’t trade it for a second I got to spend with you.
But right now, four days after saying goodbye, it feels like the heartbreak will never heal, like I will never smile again.
Rest in peace, my darling Dozer. I will never forget you, and I will never stop loving you.
Love,
Your mum xoxo
Thank you SASH
To the vets and nurses at the Small Animal Specialist Hospital (SASH),
Thank you for the extraordinary care, skill, and kindness you showed Dozer. Every moment, from the medical expertise to the gentle reassurance and cheering him on, meant more to me than I can say. Knowing he was in such capable, compassionate hands gave me comfort during the hardest days. I will always be deeply grateful for everything you did for my beautiful boy. – Nagi x
I am so sorry Nagi for the heartbreaking loss of Dozer as a lot of us most likely know the pain you are going through.
When It’s time for another one Dozer will be with you as that is I am sure he would want for you to love another so please that will certainly help you but Dozer will always be with you.
Much love to you and Dozer now has his wings 💔🪽🪽
Sorry for your loss. Losing our loved dogs is so hard. Dozer was fortunate to not only be loved by you but so many people. Thinking of you.
Thank you for sharing Dozer with us, so sorry for your loss 💔 I shall miss him too
Hi Nagi, I have been a long time follower of ur blog, but I’m usually not one to leave comments on anything (I mean anything, not just ur blog). But I wanted to reach out and let u know that even from across the globe from u in Texas, I have loved Dozer and enjoyed seeing snippets of ur relationship with him. The Life of Dozer section was always the one I jumped to look at first, even before the recipes. My heart aches for u. I never thought I’d cry over someone else’s pet, but he truly was a special pup to have been loved by so many people around the world. I’m a pet-mom myself and my oldest girl is 15, and I know the time is coming eventually to let her go. I want to share with u a quote that comforts me when I think of that approaching time, and I hope it comforts u too. It is said that Martin Luther once said to his dog, “Be thou comforted, little dog, Thou too in Resurrection shall have a little golden tail”. I picture Dozer in whatever doggie heaven there may be, running around a beach and jumping in the ocean with an extra “golden” golden tail, and that is a picture to hold on to. He is not in any pain or discomfort anymore. The ravages of age and illness is past and he is at peace. He will not be forgotten. I hope this brings u peace.
Dearest Nagi: I am so sorry Dozer is gone. He will live on in your heart and the many wonderful memories of your almost 14 years together. Sending hugs and lots of love, Debbie (a dog person)
We will all miss Dozer, Nagi, none more than you, his lifelong buddy. Thank you for sharing him.
Dear Nagi
Although I don’t know you, I have always enjoyed your Dozer highlights. There are no words but, perhaps it will help to know we are keeping you in our thoughts during this time.
Karin
Crying too. For the beautiful joy and love that Dozer gave to you, and to all. For all the times we say our final goodbyes to those with whom we have shared that same joy and love.
I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved Dozer. Losing a pet is never easy, I know. When I had to put my cat to sleep it was one of the worst days of my whole entire life. I was absolutely devastated, it didn’t seem real. But gradually, with time, I healed. You will too, even if it doesn’t seem possible right now. For Dozer to have had such a long happy life was a blessing. A lot of dogs don’t live to be Dozer’s age, so that was a blessing for you both. And remember, saying goodbye to Dozer, though painful, was not a forever goodbye – it’s ’til you meet again.’ And I have no doubt he’ll be waiting for you. For now, rest in peace, sweet Dozer. You were loved by all. 💕
I read your story about Dozer, its so sad. I remember seeing him on tv with you. Pets give us so much love and get us through life’s challenges. Thinking of you Nagi, in this tough time 😢
😢 but soo much love. Never ever forgotten.
I am so sad to hear this news.
Dozer was a beautiful boy and he brought joy to so many people. He will be greatly missed. Thinking of you Nagi and sending love. xx
You should be so proud that your beautiful boy fought so hard because he loved you so much. You gave him the best life. Take care.
Awwwww Ngai,my heart goes out to you. So so difficult to lose a loved pet. I know I’ve been there. Hugs and love to you. Dozer was certainly a well loved and beautiful friend.
Nagi, the heart felt loss is so very hard. I struggled when I had to say goodbye to my girl Dotty. She loved me and was with me for 20 years. Yes 20. Our final goodbye was incredible. Dotty knew what I was feeling and she reassured me.
There’s a chap in the UK who is an incredible k9 artist, I contacted him and commissioned a stunning portrait of Dotty. It’s just beautiful and helps me every time I look at it. His name is Paul Doyle, if you want to contact him let me know, I will be happy to pass that info on to you.
Love and more love
Sue
My heart is with you. The love you shared with Dozer was so deep, so visible, and so pure and that kind of love doesn’t disappear when a body does. It changes form. It lingers in habits, in quiet moments, in the way your heart still reaches for him without thinking.
Please know this: it doesn’t get easy, but it does become manageable. Some days will feel calm, and others will rush in and crash all at once. When that happens, it’s okay. Grief has no schedule, no right or wrong shape. However it shows up is valid.
Dozer would want his mama to smile again not because he mattered any less, but because he mattered so much. And while he may not be there physically, I truly believe he’s still walking beside you spiritually, in every place love once lived.
Until you meet again, may he be somewhere soft and warm, with unlimited frozen ice cubes, endless head rubs, and all the joy he ever knew with you. And may you be wrapped in arms of love here, held gently through every wave of this journey. “ Somewhere beyond the ache and tears,
Beyond the weight of missing years,
A loyal heart still waits above—
With wagging tail and endless love.
Until we meet, run wild and free,
And save a place in heaven for me.”
Hoping that the sad raw days ahead pass as quickly as possible, even though it feels that isn’t possible. You boy would definitely want that for you….. and he will forever be in your minds eye. 💜
Nagi, Dozer had the best life with you as his mum and you very much went to the end of the earth for him, he was everything to you and you were everything to him and I truly believe spiritually he ain’t going nowhere, every minute of every day he is right there next to you. We all loved Dozer and will miss him very much ♥️♥️♥️
Dear Nagi,
Very sorry about your loss..😢
Now, Dozer really knows how much YOU really loved him.
He was very lucky to have you. Can’t think, know of anyone who was/is as devoted as yourself.
You were the best!
Perhaps too much, but we know how big of a heart ❤️ you have!
You’ve done everything imaginable.
Will miss your creative interactions with Dozer,
But it was time to move on.
God will get you through this.
Please keep the faith and trust in him.
Love you,
Robin
I will truly miss Dozer, what a wonderful boy. Wishing you all the best, and all the time you need to rest and recover from such a tough time. Sending all my love from California <3